I have an evil alter-ego. A hidden misanthrope.
That person, whom we'll call Evilorna, got called out of her cave a couple of times this weekend, with dire results.
First, I had to drive over to my daughter's place on Saturday morning because one of her children told Dave that she was alone in the house and she didn't like it. Naturally, I zoomed over, but when I found that she hadn't seen her dad, who was out in the back yard watering vegetables, and hadn't heard her mother say goodbye because she was trying not to be distracted from her tv show, Evilorna had a good 45 seconds of wanting to shake her silly. That's how long it took her to come over and kiss me about 50 times and say she was sorry.
Later the same day, I had to banish Evilorna after some brash young man tried to make a left turn while we were zipping lawfully through the intersection. I sat stunned, but Evilorna successfully completed at least three rude and noxious gestures while daring said man to lose eye contact until she was finished.
She had a pretty good evening last night, just lazing in her dark place while I had a really good time at a wedding reception with Dave, Emily and Robyn---she did try to make a break for it when encountered by a woman in a really outrageously short, tight dress and amazing cheekbones, but I beat her down. We were with family, after all.
And, sad to say, at the Byward Market, she actually managed to press my bag down (hard!) on a box of raspberries belonging to a woman who tried to charge me too much for my pitiful purchase of apples and peaches.
I've managed to subdue her tonight with a couple of glasses of wine and a dark chocolate KitKat, but watch out. You never know when she's going to be in your face.