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Tuesday, 7 June 2011

Things to do with toddlers

  • play tickling games
  • let them wear your shoes
  • be the first to give them an ice cream cone, then just sit back and marvel
  • hide their special bear (once only)
  • leave their special bear in a doll stroller in a store you forgot you went to (practice aplogizing)
  • pretend you're going to cut them off when they run straight at you, then zig, then zag
  • swoop them up when they've miscalculated the distance between the curb and their nose
  • let them write over the side of your car with a pointy rock
  • tell them they're the smartest, prettiest, darlingest kid when their cousins are nowhere nearby
  • let them kick you repeatedly in the chest while you are simultaneously changing their diaper and murmuring, "Gently, gently"
  • buy them special treats that come in packs whose labels fall off and make up games to guess if they're the Strawberry Toddlerbits or the Cheesy ones
  • listen over and over to The Noisy Kitty book which has only one meow sound
  • make them special dinners which they hate, then give them peanut butter toast
  • remember to wipe off the diaper cream left on your chin when you played "Cream for you, cream for me"
  • try not to be jealous when they learn how to say "Dave"
  • tell them that pullalong turtle is so the best toy ever, so you get value for your $7.99
  • encourage their love of books; you can always buy another one if it turns out that the whole last chapter of a mystery is missing
  • find a special place on the neck where only you kiss them
  • be prepared to love them just as ferociously when they get to be 6, 8 or 15.


  1. Lorna, Have I told you lately how much I love you

    Sue XXXX

  2. I hope Dave has a durn good excuse for wearin that tie.

  3. Oh! Did your toddler learn how to say "Dave" before "Lorna"? NO fair!!

    Loved this post. And for sure buy the toddler tons of books! :)

  4. This is fabulous! I like the way you think! :)
    Sending love ~

  5. Lorna, this is such heart-felt toddler wisdom that I wish I had written it. You should submit this to one of your local papers for publication. I'm not so sure about the pointy rock on the car, however. The book thing is A+++.