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Tuesday 6 November 2012

Angst + Angst = Chocolate

A funny thing happened on my way to my golden years.

Like any decent planner, I had a picture in my mind of where I would be in 5 years, and of course, all the usual suspects were part of it.

Really, I saw myself as half of the family alpha dog, toothless but aware of all the goings-on and happily presiding over some of them.  It was an innocent enough picture, and one based on what had been turning out to be a nice combination of family, friends, work, leisure and travel.

I'd heard that the years speed by faster the older you get, and that had actually been my experience for the most part:grandchildren morphing from babies to lanky kids, our kids shedding their worst characteristics in favour of becoming loving and responsible adults, our own selves trying to stay ahead of our memories, and not actually doing very well at that.

And the picture started changing.  I got more and more involved in my volunteer work, and started collaborating a bit with Dave on his work, he signed new and more complicated contracts and before I knew it, we seem to each be living alone together in this tiny apartment, each with our schedules, neither with our full capacities and both puzzled by how we got here.  And did I mention meals?  We used to have our breakfasts together, and most of our dinners, but that's been replaced by late and solitary breakfast for one and early and solitary for the other, not always the same early one but still solitary.  Lunch is yoghurt or look after yourself.  Dinner?  Dinner happens when one of us is hungry enough to see if there's something to eat.  I can go a long time....

This new part of our golden years sucks.  Thank God New Year's is coming up soon---probably with the speed of light.  Maybe we can sit down and make some resolutions about what we really want and how to get it.

Until then, I'll be the slightly hungry one at the laptop in the bedroom.

4 comments:

  1. And I shall be following along closely, to see what brilliant solutions you two come up with. It's not much different around here. Roommates, basically.

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  2. Dave shoulda bought that hat when he was in CP. lol

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  3. Since we are in the golden years, can can empathize with you. However, life suddenly throws ma a curve ball, and we get back in sync, at least a little bit. Medical appointments really disrupt us the most. Our volunteerism is centered on church activities, although I do have a couple of others. Husband has had a few curves balls. too.

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  4. Ah, Lorna. It's impossible to know what the future will take us to. Sure we can plan, but we need to be flexible with what actually happens.

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