Doing it the hard way

Today I did a few things wrong:

• I got up.  actually I only later found out that this was wrong

I forgot I'd had a severe haircut and thought I saw my brother in the mirror---not the one with the long curly hair

• I found that I had bought veal, after carefully keeping a never-veal promise made to Sarah about 30 years ago
• when I made the veal into a stew, I used chicken Bovril to enhance the taste
• when I intended to have berries and yoghurt for lunch, I accidentally had cheese, shaved ham and a Laura Secord easter egg
• I put nail polish on while having lunch and then ate polished shaved ham but I think I'm all right---the nail polish turned all my hangnails into plasticized weapons of destruction
• I tripped over some books I'd left on the floor so that no one would notice I was over my quota and consequently left a noseprint on the bedroom window
• I have only had one cup of coffee
• and no wine.