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Wednesday, 16 October 2013

Tuesday Evening Patheticizing

Yes, I've missed you!

Actually, I've been missing myself---I just can't seem to get the balance in my life that I need.  Thank god my family is a generous one.  Or maybe they're just apathetic.

I've been a volunteer, one way or another, all my remembered life.  And I know, there are those of you who think that might be right back to 2007.  I always got such a personal reward from volunteering, and up until this last work with a national organization I won't name, I've always been able to figure out how to say, "Would love to do that, but I just can't" when I needed to.

I wonder if I feel unable to manage this because things are so dire, so not-working, in this really important and valuable organization , or if it's that I'm afraid if I slow down they'll find out they can do without me.

That's pathetic.  And worse than pathetic because I actually believe it's both. I think I've known that for a while and still haven't worked out how to have my cake and eat it too.

Some of the things I've considered:

  • changing my name
  • adding a new letter to the middle of my email address
  • pulling out my hair
  • completely quitting in a snit
  • completely quitting in a suit
  • completely quitting with grace and honour
  • moving
  • moving very far
  • staying home but never answering the phone
  • giving up all technology invented after the quill pen
  • living in a tent in the locker room of our building
  • doing nothing but eating Magnum Mini Bars and drinking sparkly wine till my arteries burst
  • starting my own organization in support of people who don't know how to unvolunteer
  • quitting my ownmade-up organization in a selfless act of leading by example
  • moving "blog-writing" from last place on my ToDo list
Nah, I'll probably just have another teeny-tiny Lindt chocolate square and another teeny-tiny glass of wine, and then go sleep for at least 3 hours.

8 comments:

  1. Magnum + wine sounds good, but probably not together.

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  2. If you are moving very far, please consider Redondo Beach. I sure know what you mean by the dilemma of changing your volunteer status. I'm not anonymous, by the way, but it's posting me as that. You know who I am, I hope.

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  3. Those all sound like good options, but I like the last one best.

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  4. I tried taking out the options that were based on you not being useful to the organization, since I know that to be UNTRUE, and that left only all of them. How about putting two options in a hat - either quitting tomorrow, or allowing another month for things to start improving. If you pick the former it was fate, and you can move on. If you pick the latter, the wine and choco can sustain you for a month, after which you can quit if no progress, and that too will be fate. Lovingly, your other half.

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  5. I've missed you, too!!! I'm sooooo weary of all the mean people that seem to be out there

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  6. Ah, Lorna. Every organization wants someone like you! I'm a volunteer too. Sometimes I wonder if there are a LOT of people who don't realize volunteer means NOT PAID and it's not fair to dump all the work on one or two unpaid people.

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  7. Saying no is hard sometimes, but volunteering should be voluntary, not necessary. It's all about boundaries!!
    Chocolate and wine...perfection!!

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  8. LORNA, you sent out the e-mail that you were consolidating e-mails. lornacr@gmail. I e-mailed you, but it said it wasn't working. What is the right e-mail for you these days?

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