Is Sunday a day of retrospection chez vous?
It used to be the case for me after freeing up my Saturdays from preparation for the Sacrament of Confession.
As things wound down after dinner, I'd have some time to look ahead and see what was coming up in the week, as well as to look back at what had gone on and how it met or didn't meet my expectations. For the most part, it was a satisfying exercise, but now that all my kids are on their own and we're semi-retired, it hasn't been seeming so urgent.
I had always adopted the new technology as it came along when I was working, and depended on my PDA to help my memory sort things out, but somewhere along the line, the PDA downgraded to Google Calendar, which works, but doesn't seem as compelling to me as my own chiming, ringing, buzzing, vibrating Blackberry (with games).
I was horrified tonight to come home from dinner with my family and find a bunch of sticky notes and memo pad paper lined up next to my laptop. Now, there's artistic license for you---"lined up" doesn't really convey paperclips, rejected jewellery, Nintendo stylus, folded and folded and stuck-together paper product scattered on top of the pristine, never-even-cracked-open notebook I bought at Chapters so I could stay on top of things.
Organizational procedures and management were never difficult for me. I dealt with a piece of paper or an e-mail once and moved it on to the next action or junked it. I kept track of my messages and wrote on the back of them the date and time I'd returned the call. I never left e-mails in my in-box or messages on my phone.
Those days are gone. Retrospection today tells me that it wouldn't have hurt me, when I stopped working, to just get rid of my uptight work-costumes while keeping the handy gadgets and possibly obsessive habits. Deep retrospection reminds me that I'd have to confess to a whole lot of creative blasphemy now that I've noticed how slack I've become (if I were ever to recontemplate the Sacrament of Confession). Deeper retrospection digs up a foggy memory of a beautiful rosy leather appointment and address book my folks gave me for one of my birthdays, which might just stand me in good stead now.
Preception tells me I'll have forgotten the angst by tomorrow morning.